To me, intrinsic motivation has a near monopoly on my behavior. I can be proud of this because this makes me appear to be the star child of the p-funk thang, “Funk is its own reward.” This can also be tragic because tragedy easily correlates with monopolies. For people who know the funk, we know the next line is, “May I frighten you?”
Embracing this pride of self-starting is frightening as it can be mistaken for selfishness—especially when the one making this mistake is not satisfied with one’s accomplishments. What’s frightening to me is the realization that these people outnumber me and as I get older they threaten to overwhelm me with their non-conscious influence. I can hear them now—and they are saying, “Get to the point!”
“I am you and what I see is me…” not p-funk but Pink Floyd… but I digress…
In the Gregorian 2008, Fawn Chang helps me make my point in “The Power—and Purpose—of Winter”:
There is treasure buried deeply in winter. For thousands of years, humans have used winter to go inside, repair, rest and mend and return to stillness, entering what Feng Shui calls a yin state of rest, reflection and spiritual connection.
But wait: our modern digital world doesn’t stop (unless nature’s efforts shut down the power grid). Everything in our world seems to be on high volume 24/7/365; non-stop activity is pace of life today and it is toxic to career and life fulfillment.
This may be my first clear statement in this Blog post: the power fueling my intrinsic motivation depends on the winter season’s “yin state of rest, reflection and spiritual connection”—the last two or three winters, however, have not been available to me for such retiring/recharging.
Besides apparently blaming other people, what’s my problem? The leading answer is physical and metaphysical debt. Everyone on earth who can spell the word economy knows about our economic-deficit lifestyle—but this debt can be metaphysical as well. This informs the list debt sources that have been chasing me lately:
- The oppressive feeling of stagnation due to servicing vulgar debt (credit card debt)
- Not-so-subtle sleep deprivation from noisy neighbors
- Taxing stress from parking extremely close to neighbors with oversized vehicles on a daily basis
- The lack of personal quality time owing to excessive commuting (and incredibly high fuel costs)
- The lack of healthy social recreation owing to family, friends and associates suffering and isolating
